Today a friend gave me his blog id and i read the stuff he wrote. It was liberating in a few ways. First, I got another direction to look at when it comes to talking about my inability to write anymore. His writing is very laid back. It's very conversation styled. It's relaxing to read his words, unlike my cousin's who only make everything sound twisted and fancy. No, I get you are deep, I get symbolism and metaphors as well, but really man, give it a rest sometimes. So, anyway, I read one of his posts and it was about this random (to me) anonymous girl, who he apparently loves, but can never have. Heavy stuff. But he wasn't his whiney self. I actually was smiling while reading his rants. It was a fresh perspective on things.
Then I read one of his other posts, it was about being single and then missing being in a relationship. Well, I have never been in a relationship. I am yet to figure out the reason behind it, but whatever it is, I have never held a guy's hand and walked. I have never watched a movie with my head resting on someones shoulder, I have never had a guy look in to my eyes and tell me I am beautiful. Never. In fact I think I am a little scared of guys. Yeah, I guess it puts me in the loser category but whatever it is, its true. So, when I read about his feelings about this whole thing, I was slightly taken aback.
When I was in school, I mean, when we were in school, I used to have a crush on this guy and I like to believe that he did too, for a few days at least. So, when I read him write about all this all this time later I was forced to think where did I slip. I was never really into all this. I can't even flirt. I mean, I have never done it. I wish I could but I just can't. After a certain point it doesn't really matter.
I say it doesn't matter because when I read his posts, I realised you can only care about trivial things as love when you are satisfied with yourself, your life. And God knows that I am anything but satisfied. So, that's how I linked my now dead writing, I could not write because of my unsatisfaction has lead to being totally and completely uninspired.
I wish things were different, I wish I was more at ease. But turns out things are not as easy as shown on Friends. Life can be a pile of poop, and I am right in the middle of it, trying to get the fuck out of it. I am trying. GOD, I need this stupid Engineering to get over, and get a job so that I can get on with my life!
Forever in poop
- Ex.
Then I read one of his other posts, it was about being single and then missing being in a relationship. Well, I have never been in a relationship. I am yet to figure out the reason behind it, but whatever it is, I have never held a guy's hand and walked. I have never watched a movie with my head resting on someones shoulder, I have never had a guy look in to my eyes and tell me I am beautiful. Never. In fact I think I am a little scared of guys. Yeah, I guess it puts me in the loser category but whatever it is, its true. So, when I read about his feelings about this whole thing, I was slightly taken aback.
When I was in school, I mean, when we were in school, I used to have a crush on this guy and I like to believe that he did too, for a few days at least. So, when I read him write about all this all this time later I was forced to think where did I slip. I was never really into all this. I can't even flirt. I mean, I have never done it. I wish I could but I just can't. After a certain point it doesn't really matter.
I say it doesn't matter because when I read his posts, I realised you can only care about trivial things as love when you are satisfied with yourself, your life. And God knows that I am anything but satisfied. So, that's how I linked my now dead writing, I could not write because of my unsatisfaction has lead to being totally and completely uninspired.
I wish things were different, I wish I was more at ease. But turns out things are not as easy as shown on Friends. Life can be a pile of poop, and I am right in the middle of it, trying to get the fuck out of it. I am trying. GOD, I need this stupid Engineering to get over, and get a job so that I can get on with my life!
Forever in poop
- Ex.
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| Where the fuck is my Unicorn, pooping customize rain-fucking-bow? |
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